Everyone does it, you look at someone and in your mind, if something is off, you think, “oooh girl, no.” You walk around every day running into what might be considered a “hot mess.” And somehow you manage to internalize it, you push through and don’t say anything to their face because you don’t want to offend anyone. You were raised better than that, right?
But what happens when you’re behind the keys of a computer keyboard? What happens when you look online and see a queen get up in their gig and they’re living for themselves. In your mind, if you don’t like it, you say, “oooh girl, no.” But somehow, your manners and whatever you were raised to do right suddenly goes out the window. You go to the keys and type something so extreme and so hateful that the elders of your family would be ashamed of you.
You carry on about someone’s makeup, outfit or even their tuck as though the queen is attempting to win a prize from you in the amount of one hundred thousand dollas. You say, “Ew, gross, that hair is rachet, your makeup is terrible (thanks for that Alaska),” or worse, “that’s the ugliest… you should kill yourself.”
Why do you feel it necessary to say so much? Who made you the authority on what looks good and what looks bad? When someone has a specific look that you don’t get, does that make it wrong? Or are you simply uncultured and therefore undeserving of expressing that opinion?
Yes, we know, you love drag and RuPaul and any queen that was a finalist on RuPaul’s Drag Race because that is the only type of drag in the world… no! We share the photos of the queens we see because there’s more to drag than Mama Ru. She’s showing you that too. Look at the unconventional beauties she’s had on her show; Trixie Mattel, Milk, Jinkx, Sharon, Yara, Pandora Boxx (at the time) and of course Tammie Brown. All those queens are gorgeous, but when they brought their looks to the show it was seen as, “you’ll never make it, you don’t have the look.”
They’re unique and they have made a huge impact on the drag world. They have spin off shows, they have traveled the world, they have been asked to be a part of so many drag events around the world because they stood out. They heard what people were saying about them, they felt the things you say about them, but they didn’t let that stop what they were going to do.
All the while, you were saying, “oh no girl…” they were getting booked, getting asked to host gigs, getting flown all over the country and world and visiting places most people have to pay to go visit on their own. If RuPaul can see something special in these queens, you can too. You can stop expecting the drag world to do everything based on your agenda.
Your negative comments don’t help anything, your positive attitude can make even you feel better about the world. If you spend more time giving compliments and less time throwing shade you’ll feel better about yourself and your day. You’ll be that person that can say, “I was telling her she was awesome before she got super famous.” Or, “I knew she’d make it big someday.”